My professor told us that he had a childhood friend who was with a woman for a long, long time, and he loved her very much, and they had children together, and then one day she just threw him out.
He saw her recently and she was struggling to explain to him why she had done it, why she had suddenly rejected the love of this man she had spent her whole life with.
“Let me try,” my professor said. “You didn’t want to be the only woman he had ever loved.”
“That’s it exactly,” she said.
Then my professor said, “We don’t want to be unique. We think we do, but really we want to be one of many. We don’t want to be the person someone has loved uniquely, the only person they have loved. We want to be the person they loved most out of all, loved most out of everyone.”